March 27, 2007

nope. you read right. 

i was looking through some old notebooks and i found this journal that a good friend gave me before i left california. i thought it was going to be a 2 week vacation... it became that one major decision that changed my life for good. read on, hope you pick up a thing or two...

"they say its the journey, not the destination. i say its both. the journey allows you to become a better person, to serve your purpose at your destination. 

2007 began as a crazy year... maybe because its my year... my year to take the journey with my faith & Father. i've always managed to stay in control of everything. contests, business, parties, people... i thought God was at my disposal too. i was wrong. God is in control of me, my life and my future. He holds my blue print, my layout. and although my heart knows it, my head can't seem to grasp it. i can't seem to let go. but God is good. he has let me unravel this mystery and realize that He is at work. i can't see it now, but i can feel it. now the key is to submit my heart and ind to what He is going to do. 

i am sitting at the terminal, waiting to board the plane back to toronto. it's like sitting at the very first car of the roller coaster... exciting & nerve wrecking all at once. "

2 years later, and i am at awe at how the Lord has managed to take hold of my life and my heart. how changed i am, how different i see things. i am still amazed at how He has been so patient and kind, loving me in spite of my imperfection, my sin, my being hard headed. 

2 years later,  i am amazed at how He has blessed me in all areas of my life! i am excited for what the next year holds for me. i am surrendered, at peace and waiting. 

=)

Just an update

so much has happened since my last post. i can't even begin to tell you about the goodness of the Lord in my life. with classes, new clients, orders... ang dami dami talaga. i am now supplying at karton, who happens to be located at like 4 different malls. =) so wonderful talaga. He has brought new people into my life as well. and these new people have impacted my life in a great way. it's amazing. 

someday, i'll be able to talk more about it. but for now, i am praying. praying about this new person. and just how the journey ahead will be a difficult one. i am waiting still for the Lord's leading in my life. other than that, steady lang ako. working away. =) 

thanks for reading!

blank

i can't seem to think of a title. but i just want to share how thankful i am to God for His faithfulness. that was the message last night at church. Evangelist Bill Hill showed us in the Bible over and over again, how the Lord has promised that He will be faithful to us. 

my prayer is that i will always be faithful to Him, no matter what. 

last night, it was so wonderful how minutes before the service started, He had already answered my prayers! God is truly faithful! 

i can't wait for Him to show me more of the things He has for me to do! 

more to blog tomorrow! =)

6,8,12

6 months, 8 days, 12 hours since you went away... that's what's singing in my head right now. LSS... last song syndrome kasi! how can someone count those days? i think i stopped counting at a week. i mean if they walk out of your life, they'll find their way back right? if they ever want to come back. 

now, since i did the walking, i won't do the counting. 

anyway, it's been almost 12 hours since the craziest two weeks of my life or 2008 has ended! now that i can count! it was a wonderfully tiring week. from driving back and forth, going up and down the stairs (wow! nicer calves!!), to just making sure everyone had everything they needed. it was so much fun because i was doing it for the best boss of my life.... The Lord! no great earthly rewards, but the heavenly jewels are waaaaaay worth it! 

in between, i've been meeting with rom and top, just discussing our bags and how we need forms for ordering and purchasing the materials. it's so exciting. we're going full force with this project as well, and Lord-willing we will be at the Intercontinental Hotel for a bazaar this coming month!! 

the blouses did great at both bazaars. we are excited about the ones that are coming up very soon! new styles, colors to come!! =) i just have to remember to focus and be patient with all this that is happening... 

here's to a wonderful week!! 

creations

when i first made this blog, i had good intentions about making it my scrappin' blog. but yeah. day to day stuff is here too. i have been creating... as promised. a few layouts here and there. here are a few of my recent layouts. my most favorite one is the one entitled Someday. a good friend of mine snapped it with my camera as we were waiting for the wedding of RnK to start. the picture gives you a sneak peek into my feelings about marriage and settling down. SOMEDAY... i know it'll come. someday. i believe it. as much as i want to be ready for it, there are little things that scare me about it. but someday. someday i'll be ready. and that someday, will be the perfect day. i love how he captured the train of kristen's dress, the lovely flowers, my watch (signifying time) and most importantly, me sitting and waiting patiently! 

the others naman are about my family, my sister and my favorite project in life - spending time with children. 

last year, before robbie got married, we got the chance to go to EK as a family. 4 kami with george (alex's bf) and milli (our inaanak). ang saya saya ko. kasi lahat kami together. we all had a blast talaga. this was the week before jorgie flew off to iloilo and alex naman went back to toronto na. it was important to me kasi nga we were apart as a family since robbie went to college, tapos alex and i went to canada na rin. these moments are truly precious kasi nga it's very difficult to make up for the past. we can only create moments for the future. 

alex is my only sister. and she and i are pretty close. there isn't anything i wouldn't do for her and vice versa. this photo was taken right before the wedding. sobrang puyat kasi sila ni mikee kaka-gimmick that she fell asleep on a chair after the photo shoot. =) 

the last layout is of alex and majorn, an orphan at the sta rita orphanage. every chance i get, i'm there, spending time with the kids. they do have the basics in life, food, shelter, clothing. pero kulang sila sa hugs. there's so much of them and not enough hugs to go around. not enough love. si majorn, sobrang special. lagi yan when she sees me, takbo, talon, akap... ayaw bumitaw!! sobrang sweet. nakakalambot ng puso sobra. 

thanks for taking time to look!

Online Crop

wow. i've always been intrigued by online crops... like what takes place at one of those, who gets to play, etc... grabe. sobrang saya pala. it's like going to a crop without leaving your house. :) you have all your tools and toys at your fingertips. astig. 

anyway, i cropped with ladies from manila and singapore tonight. it was fun! check out the photos of the album that we worked on. 

no title

i just need to get this off my chest. chances are, no one will ever read this entry, so i have nothing to worry about. 

i am very lonely. i didn't know it until today at about 2:45pm, when i drove away from my brother's house sobbing uncontrollably. di ko na nga makita yung kalye. lately, laging ganito ang feeling ko. i'm surrounded by people, i laugh, i talk, i make people smile. but inside, my heart is so broken, so lonely. i can't even figure out why. i'm not ungrateful, no. i am very blessed and i never fail to recount as much as i can to remind me. but i am still lonely. i long to talk to someone and just tell them how i wish i could get a hug. just one long hug. or someone to hold my hand and remind me everything will be ok. that everything will fall into place. 

i know i have a ton of friends that i can call on. but i don't want to make that call. nahihiya akong sabihing, "sit with me naman. sobrang lungkot ko lang." siguro nga pride lang rin yun. pero sobrang i just long to have a friend who can see through me and see how sad i am. 

all the people around me have things going on rin naman, kaya nihihiya akong abalahin pa sila. they have things to do, places to go and people to see.

wish ko lang, one day, i'll be on someone's list of people to see, house to visit for no reason at all. yung dadalawin mo lang ako dahil gusto mo akong kamustahin. hindi yung dahil may pagagawa ka, or may hihiramin ka, or you need help with something. just visit ME. ask me how i am doing. 

i want a friend to spend saturday afternoons with. maybe at the mall, or at the nearest coffeeshop. i want someone to make plans with for the evening. kahit anong kalokohan lang. kahit to walk the aisles of the grocery. and i just want a friend. i don't need a lifetime plan, or a promise. i just want a friend. no strings attached. just a true friend. 

movies and tears

alright, i have to admit... i am a sucker for sappy movies. alam mo yung feeling when may sobrang romantic or mushy scene, your heart can feel this like gentle pain? yeah... those. i had one of those last night. and it's just funny because i do cry at movies (kaya sobrang nakakahiya akong date! hahaha), but there are a few moments when i find it hard to breathe. i guess it's because i can totally relate to movies. 

minsan nga i feel dapat wag nang manuod ng mga tagalog movies na yan. pero kasi sa totoo lang, ang sarap kiligin. ang sarap ma-feel yung like ligawan stage where all the kilig moments happen. although i always find myself wondering, "does this kind of kilig really exist in real life?" or better yet, parang gusto makita yung life nila sa movie like maybe 4-5 years later... is it still the same? nakaka-kilig pa ba? or may kilig pa ba? 

the other day i saw PS: I Love You (Hilary Swank). ganda. i won't blow it if you haven't seen it, but i suggest that you do. wonderful lesson for couples. (i know... i'm not part of a couple right now, but hey! malapit na yan!!) anyway, ayun... i was sobbing through out the movie. and i think a few hours after it pa! grabe. buti na lang sa house lang ako nanuod. can you imagine!? may ka-date ka tapos YUCKIEEE!! umiiyak sa movie! hahaha. 

anyway, this should be one of my last OT entries. i promised joanne yap more of my scrap-happenings entries...

no qwento

alam ko, super long overdue na talaga yung serious na qwento and update on my life. its just been very busy since i got home. the carinderia is doing well. waaaay better than when it first started. i believe that we are turning the corner already and all it needs is for us to be focused on what we have before us. 

i was drafted to work on a fundraiser for LBBCA since they are scheduled to go to Palawan for the National Student Convention. we've been doing pretty good naman. yun lang, the pressure of the ticket purchase is creeping up on us and I don't know what we are going to do.... I pray that we'll have the money to buy the tickets na! the Lord will provide. I know He will!! 

i've also been working closely with another church friend, on raising funds for our future camp site in antipolo! we are off to a slow start, but we have leads. its just a matter of time and working on the leads that we have. it's been very exciting to see how The Lord works in as far as stretching my vision is concerned. there are days that i get panicky but HE is quick in reminding that i just need to trust. 

the benefit concert is coming up.... aaaaaaah!! stress. but it's a good stress. i think it's only a matter of time before we start having full rehearsals and things start falling into place! i can't wait for a lovely performance!! 

PreOwned Stuff for Sale

You scrappers know how it is... You're out on a sunny afternoon, with all intentions of just "checking out what's new"... right? Before you know it, your bill is sky high! Your bag of goodies need to live in the trunk for a few days just so your hunee doesn't notice...

i have so much stuff that i need to PURGE! it's tough to let go, but i have to do it! so if you're interested, please send me an email at sasuncion@yahoo.com. thanks for looking!! 

Vancouver & Daddy

vancouver has always been a city that intrigued me! i mean, its pretty from a few thousand feet up in the air, the airport is gorgeous and well from what i hear... its just pretty all together. 

so i think this year it'll be my next stop. i will make it a point to visit vancouver and spend say a week here, who knows... i may just move here... hahaha. yeah. knowing my track record for moving and picking up... who knows right? 

dad and i had a great time yesterday. we went to dimsum with ninong paeng and ninang sylvia. it was fun. we just talked about old times and just how much things have changed. and then dad and i hit mississauga and visited lola. after that we did more stuff before settling down for dinner at swiss chalet. hmm... sarap sobra! 

so this morning, as i was getting ready to leave, i could not help but think of how much of a daddy's & mommy's girl i am. at my age, you'd think saying goodbye and getting on a plane would be easy. something i've gotten used to. i still choke up when i hear daddy say "i love you hija. i'll be praying for your safe trip." it makes me well up inside and just want to run back and stay there. be with him. be with him and mommy. not because it's comfortable being around them... no. it's because i love being with them. the talks that we have, sometimes the arguments, the silly things we talk about. the dreams that we talk about, the prayers we whisper as a family. i cannot wait until we meet in hong kong this month. it'll be the perfect way to celebrate father's day and their wedding anniversary. 

i love you dad. can't wait to see you.

He is Great!

The past few months have been very exciting... crazy and wild. But all I can say is that GOD IS GOOD! He has been so faithful to us. Just always protecting us from late nights, long hours, sickness. The business has been picking up like you can't believe. When people said we couldnt... Or that we wouldn't last.... Obviously, they don't know our GOD and how HE IS GREAT!!

To add to the long list of blessings we have, we got an apartment just this morning. When we thought it was going to be a difficult one, it wasn't!! So Alex and Mom are going to move in this weekend since its a long weekend.

And just when we thought we were SUPER BLESSED, dad called us to let us know that the Canadian embassy wrote mom about her citizenship! They've verified it and now we are moving on to the final step of Jorge's (pictured on the right!) adoption! PRAISE HIM PRAISE HIM!!

Count your blessings!

Name them one by one!

Count your many blessings!

See what God has done!

I'll be back in Manila in a few days and I'll be blogging my journey from there... Or whenever I have time!

each day is a chance to learn

i learned something new today!! =) i haven't been into my blog only because i can never figure things out on it... but today, i learned something new! i figured out how to add links to my page! how cool is that!?!?

i dont believe that old dog can't learn new tricks... they so can! the trick is they have to want to learn new tricks! and as scary and freaky as the internet or the computer age gets, i find myself wanting to dabble in it... so here i am today, proud and excited about my new discovery!!

have a great day!

in with the new and stay with the old

i've grown so much. i used to be very aggressive on certain things... i still am, but i am more picky about what... i have learned to "choose my battles" as jun dela cruz would say it. and one of the changes i have seen in me, is just the way i look at things... kahit luma na, i still appreciate it and see it with NEW EYES!

living in manila has been wonderful! i've always loved living in manila. this time, i have learned to appreciate it in a different way! i am more attentive to the new things that are coming up like restos, stores, specialty stores. i also find myself craving for things that have always been there!! like little quiapo's halo halo and pancit palabok. or this hole in the wall extra rice. their binagoongan flakes is to die for. then of course there's the all time favorite shakey's thin crust manager's choice pizza.

then there's the new... brooklyn pizza. love it! love their pizza and the wings. ok fine! the pasta too. it's good to share, but there's never enough. sophie's garden is another. i love the fact that you can be in the city yet seem so far away.

my favorite thing do to: the SPA!! a few faves are relaksasi in SM southmall which makes me feel that i am in another country. just the atmosphere, the quiet instrumental music and of course the sound of water falling quietly in corner is just perfect. and then of course there is princess carol. our favorite hangout for manis and pedis. and their 30min massages... ooh. i miss it!

but those are just the little things.

the most important to me is my faith and my church. i've been going to lighthouse for over 18 years now. can you imagine? well i lived away for almost 6 years... things have definitely changed for me. the church is still the same. we believe in the same things, do things the same way, but its just that the people are different now. we have grown. we have changed... and i love it! the kids are older, they feel the burden we have for those around us.

i love how being away has taught me so many things. being more appreciative for small things. being more careful about how others may feel. also realizing that others may not be as careful about others as i am. thinking about tomorrow than just dwelling on what went wrong today.

there's a lot about me that has changed. but the old me is still here... just brought in some new things!

so encouraging

my friend grace...
i met her a few years ago via scrapbook.com. she was my neighbor online and in real life! so after a few emails we both decided to have lunch and just meet up! oh boy!! we connected in so many different levels!!

she's filipina like i am!
she's from paranaque, like i am!
she's addicted to scrapbooking, like i am!
most importantly, she loves The Lord like i do!

those are just a few of the reasons we connected that afternoon! throughout our friendship, we've exchanged thoughts on our creations, our tools and our idols. but one of the things that she has done for me was encourage me about my passion to create. we had our one of our conversations just tonight and she mentioned updating my blog and just keeping friends posted about where i'm at...

so here i am today, updating my blog and promising that i will do whatever it takes to update this site.

my move to manila has been wonderful! The Lord provided me with a home that i have grown to love so much and most importantly, the opportunity for me to serve in church!! with the support of my pastor, the youth and our entire church family, we were able to launch COINS FOR CAMP 2008! Lord willing, it'll be an annual fundraiser to support our camp ministries. our drive started out with mineral water bottels being converted into piggy banks. we distributed it to the youth, and the rest of the church family so that they can start saving their coins (and cash!) months before camp. the second event was a garage sale which helped us raise P12,000!! they also hosted a bake sale and will be doing a FISHBALL SALE before the end of this month! Help us pray for the success of these activities!

robbie and kristen had a wonderful wedding! imagine almost 450 guests in their chruch and 385 at their reception! theirs was a ten year love story that we all prayed for! and it ended in a wonderful celebration! it was a wonderful time for friends and family to get together as well! photos are available on my friendster and facebook pages!!

i'll be posting another update tomorrow....

a little bit of glitter

its december. i know its techinically november 29, but i can feel december just springing in and taking over. the thought of jorge's birthday being a week away, alex's flight home, my birthday, christmas morning, lahat! parang natataranta ako! i feel that i havent even begun to work on what needs to be done!

the invitations, the gifts, the shopping, the planning. lahat! ayayay!

but then i look at my workstation, and i see glitter all over the place. actually, all over my body too!! kasi naman, it sticks talaga! but its a reminder that those twinkling lights, fancy ribbon and big boxes are not what christmas is all about.

its the CHILD, the KING, the FATHER. its all about HIM!! He who came to take our place.

the glitz and the glamor should be all about HIS birthday, not mine. =)

garlic fried rice and spinners

its so easy to take little things for granted. i am so guilty of that.
like the rain. we take it for granted, but God sends it our way to help us out in ways we cannot count! i like to think of it as God saying, "My child, you've been so busy, let me water your plants for you!" He is such a sweet GOD!! or the sun... imagine? without the sun, our clothes take FOREVER to dry! i think it's His way of giving me a dryer...

this week, its been quiet at home. i've been able to do a lot of stuff, clean out closets, do the dishes the right way, juice some carrots, and squeeze calamansi too. sarap sarap. it's just ME, well me and joey =)

these are the things that i didn't get to appreciate while i was living here. it's so nice to have the chance to live in manila again and be able to experience it deeper this time. i love it.

today, i went to town and i did my banking, went to the market, and got some fresh coconut juice. it was nice kasi nga, i was able to walk around and enjoy the sun. sarap sarap talaga. ang sarap ng hindi nag mamadali, my time is my own to enjoy!! =)

i thank my Father for the big things, but most especiallly for the little things. the little things that give me great joy!

can love really move mountains?

minsan, sobrang i get disillusioned about so many things. when i thought that my will power and my drive is at its best, i am reminded that my strength is not my own... it is GODs and His alone.

this week has been so tiring for me. from back to back bazaars on wednesday to firing my maid on sunday night for stealing... yes. you read it right. she stole... isang buong balikbayan box na nga yung naipon niya. grabe!! pure craziness...

to the soul searching, heart wrenching conversation that GK and i had till 4am about everyone who is someone in my life... to my heartbreaking conversation with bob. i dont think i have ever cried that hard over someone. when i cried over christopher, it was because i was so happy that i didnt have to spend forever with him.

now its totally different. i learned over the span of a few months that its always been bob. no matter how far i go, or where i go, it'll always be him. and the hardest part is being patient about where GODs plan will take us.

so my question is... can love really move mountains? i wish i knew the answer. i wish i could say yes... i wish i could explain why... or at least tell you why i wanna know. but i know love is enough to conquer anything. love is more than enough to see you through a storm.

i'd rather have bad times with you
than good times with someone else
i'd rather be beside you in a storm
than safe and warm by myself
i'd rather have hard times together
than to have it easy apart
i'd rather have the one who holds my heart

i thought i was holding my heart. i thought it was safe from pain and disappointment, hindi pala. but the good this is that bob was holding it and caring for it like no one ever has. and i'm apprehensive about what the future may hold, but together we know Who holds our tomorrow.

my work station

for the longest time, i've always wanted to have a scrapbook room. a place i can call my own, where i can sit, think, create, and just be me. so now i have one. and the feeling is wonderful. just to be able to spread out and make anything i want to is... amazing! i can leave my mess, or clean it up. i can start a project and come back to it a day later.

i know that there will be a lot of creating that will take place in this room. i can't wait for that to happen!